Drowning

This is an essay I wrote some months back.  I hope it causes other to think.  

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DROWNING:

I’m at the bottom of a swimming pool and I’m drowning. Drowning isn’t so difficult, it’s rather easy, all you have to do is relax and give into it.  The water is deep but not so that I can’t see the sky above.  There are people around the edges.  Some are pointing and talking about me.  Some seem to be laughing at me.   A few are trying to reach down to pull me out but it’s too far. 

Time seems to stretch on forever and yet seems so short as I contemplate where I am and what I should do.  It would be all too easy to just let go, give in and drown.  There really doesn’t seem to be much pain in that course, it would be all over and I wouldn’t have to think about it anymore, or anything else for that matter.  And yet there are those trying to reach down to pull me out.  Why?  Why would anyone care if I drowned?  Does it really matter?  What is it that they are offering me there above? Out in the air?  Difficulty?  Trials? Pain?  Why should I even try?  I know they can’t reach me, they can’t pull me out…  unless I reach out to them.  It’s my choice.

It seems as if I’ve been down here for so long, most of my life, forever.  And yet, it’s but a short moment.  I feel like I can take forever to make my choice, but time is running out. I will have to decide soon if I want to reach out to those who wish to aid me.  I don’t want to reach out.  The water is warm and inviting.  “Just relax and submit,” it tells me.  Why can’t I give up that easily?  I know it’s going to be painful coming out.  I can sense the discomfort of when the air will hit me and the struggles I’ll have to make to rise out of the pool.  It’s going to hurt; a lot.  It’s my choice.

I stretch my hand out, up and towards those who would rescue me. It’s a long reach and the water is resisting me, calling to me to just give in.  The water’s telling me that it’s easier to just relax and let it go.  But I can’t I have to try, and I do.  I start to kick towards the surface, it’s tiring but I must do it; or else I’ll drown.  After what seems to be an eternity I start to get close to the surface.  I’m about to break free of the water and once again take a breath of air. 

I move with increasing speed towards the surface as those who reached out to me appear to be offering encouragement.  I can almost hear them cheering me on; telling me I can do it, just a little further and I’ll be free.  At the same time I see those who were mocking me before are also increasing their efforts.  I can hear their chidings in my mind, telling me it’s not worth it, that I can’t do it, that I’m not good enough to make it.  I kick harder. 

I am about to break through surface when I am suddenly stopped.  My body slams against what seems to be a solid surface.  Just when I think I’m going to break free.  Is it ice? Glass? Or something else that keeps me trapped below to drown?  The mockers above are laughing all the harder.  “I told you it’s impossible for someone like you to get out” they are saying.  Yet the few supporters are screaming all the harder that I can make it.  Some have even jumped onto the surface and are trying to chip away at it and help me through.  I realize that it is futile for them, that nothing they do will free me.  It’s up to me.  I have to press on, to push through and take their hands. 

The water beckons to me again to relent and accept my fate.  Once again the soft lulling of the warm water calls to me to succumb and give in.  The surface is so hard and difficult to break through.  Didn’t I try after all?  Wasn’t my effort good enough that I can now relent to the waters and drown?  I am torn.  It seems so hard to break through, so easy to drown.  But I can see the clear sky above.  It’s beautiful.  Those above who wish to aid me are frantically trying to help me.  “You can do it, it’s only a little more.”  “It’s worth it.”  It’s my choice.

Suddenly the water seems to be stifling and constricting instead of warm and inviting.  It’s closing in around me and dragging me down.  I want out.  I kick harder, I bang on the surface trying to break free.  I want air all the more, even with its pain and suffering.  I want to live.  I kick and hit the surface and after a bit I start to see a crack.  The crack tries to hide itself from me but I see it and I grasp at it.  It encourages me on.  I hit harder and the crack grows.  Soon it starts to break up.  My helpers above can now help move the pieces of the surface out of the way as I continue to enlarge the hole I’ve made.  I’m breaking free. 

My head breaks through the surface and I take my first real breath of air in what seems an eternity.  It burns my lungs.  The pain is strong but also the joy overwhelming.  I struggle to climb out of my watery trap and my helpers work to pull me out.  The water doesn’t give up so easily and tries to drag me down.  As I climb free the waters reluctantly give up their hold on me and fall back. 

I am free of my bondage.  I can breathe air once again.  I can move without resistance.  The air fills my lungs, no longer burning, but strengthening me and giving me energy.  Joy begins to fill my heart as I realize what I have achieved and what I have gained.  I am finally FREE! 

I begin to relish what I now have.  Those who mocked me move away.  They can’t look me in the eyes.  Their sideward glances are filled with distain and condescension.  Those that aided me are congratulating me and helping me dry off.  I see others who are calling below the waters as if they were encouraging others to rise up.  Others are also mocking below.  Looking below there are many others in the waters as well.  Trapped below.  Some have given up and drowned.  Some are struggling to break free.  Some, after a struggle, have given up and slipped once again to the depths.  Still others are banging away at the surface trying to break through as I had done.  Others are being assisted out of the waters by helpers. 

I see a few who seem to be struggling on their own to rise to the surface and break through.  No helpers appear to be near.  When they break through, the mockers try to push them back down.  Most of these fight through anyway.  Once they start their climb out helpers are quick to assist them.  

I look about, my heart fills with the joy of my triumph and the freedom I have gained.  I still feel the pain and suffering.  But the joy overwhelms it and makes it all the more bearable.  I begin to desire for others what I have gained!  To share in it. I look below at those who are trapped.  I start to call to them.  To family and friends who are struggling below.  And then to those I don’t know. Eventually as some reach the surface and start to break through I try as I can to move away the surface pieces and help them out.  I am frustrated that I can’t reach below the surface as I want so desperately to help everyone out of that watery grave.  I must relent to the fact that some choose to remain there in the waters. 

My heart leaps with joy at each one that reaches the surface and breaks free.  My whole being becomes devoted to aiding those below to rise up and live.

To triumph over the waters of mediocrity and to breath the air of freedom is something that few have ever known, and many fail to recognize when they experience it.  I have drowned.  Now, I wish to live.  I am struggling to break through.  I’m bursting to share it with all I can. 

Ukraine and WW3

There has been a lot of talk in the past few weeks about the situation in Ukraine.  Many Americans are afraid that we are going to war.  I've spent many years in the military and would probably be at the top of the list for going over should the situation get out of hand.  However, I am rather comfortable in saying I strongly doubt anything will really come of this situation.  Why would I say that?  It's rather simple.

First of all, no one in the current presidential administration or anywhere in Europe wants any kind of conflict. Our current leadership here in America are very much of the "Neville Chamberlain" mentality when it comes to this situation.  They are more than willing to 'sacrifice' the insignificant state of Ukraine to keep from having any kind of war.  Much like Chamberlain was willing to sacrifice Czechoslovakia in an attempt to keep Germany from going too far.  But doesn't this historical example mean we are doomed to WW3 in the next few years?  While that is possible in my opinion the surrounding events don't point to that scenario playing out.  There are some significant differences between Nazi Germany and modern Russia.  I'll explain this a little latter.  

Just looking at the past experience of President Obama’s administration and how they respond to international events we cannot find anything that would show the ability let alone the desire to do anything of significance.  Obama and his advisers have consistently waffled on any real decision.  It appears that confrontations against anyone other than the Republicans or Conservatives is either not important to them or they have no concept of how to interact with those entities.  The only time they seem to have made this kind of decision was with Libya, but even then it wasn’t decisive and hindsight has shown little study or forethought in what they decided to do.  

Secondly, Europe is completely enslaved to Russia's natural gas sources.  Should the situation get out of hand you'll find Europe spending some very cold winter nights without heat, not to mention other source of electricity.  The impact on the industries of Germany would be significant in an already unstable economic environment.  Speaking of economics, another reason Europe won't go to war is because they can't afford it.  Germany would be the only nation with both the economy and resources to even consider such an effort.  However, Germany no longer has the militant culture it once had.  Germany is much less inclined to any sort of military enterprise that goes beyond self-defense.  I guess you might say they’ve had quite enough after the last couple of wars. 

Thirdly, Russia isn’t exactly in a position to press too far.  It is true they have probably one of the better economies that Russia has experienced in the past couple of centuries or more, but it’s still rather shaky and cutting of their sales of natural gas and petroleum products to Europe would severely impact their economy to the negative.  Russia has some very real interests in pressing their borders outwardly but not enough to go to war.  Actually pressing their borders outwardly is what they see as a defensive measure to protect the motherland.  A superb in-depth discussion on this can be found on the Stratfor website.  Additionally President Putin is very much emboldened by the lack of decisiveness of President Obama in the past over major international events. 

With the proper perspective we can see that Russia is resorting to their time proven methods of ensuring safety for the motherland.  By distance.  Both Napoleon’s and Hitler’s invasion attempts have proven this method to be a viable option.  When you bring the Baltic States and then Ukraine along with Belorussia into the western European influence you move Russia’s buffer zone of protection from thousands of miles to mere hundreds of miles from Moscow.  Now that makes Russians very nervous.  A key difference between Putin’s Russia and Hitler’s Germany in 1938 is the fact that Putin has little desire currently to possess the world while Hitler was driven by the idea that he had to control the world.  Putin is a bit smarter and will only seek to control his portion of the world.

So what do I think will happen?  The United States and Europe while making a lot of noise as to how unfair or illegal they view this situation will do nothing significant.  Russia emboldened by the lack of activity on the west’s part will continue to press to bring those former Soviet republics back into their realm of influence.  Russia will likely carve off or allow to be carved off additional portions of Ukraine along the ethnic divides.  Obviously Ukraine unable to even serve as a speed bump against Russia will balk and complain but in the end will do little.  Belorussia will take note and will find themselves walking closer to the influence of “Mother Russia.”  Putin is not likely to press into the ethnically Ukrainian predominate portions of Ukraine, nor are they likely to press into the Baltic States which have already strongly aligned with the west.  That option would likely provoke a significantly stronger response from the west and risk an all out war. The US will continue to boisterously complain but do nothing more than superficial actions. 

Now this isn’t saying that some kind of Black Swan event may provoke an unexpected response and thus escalates events into an armed conflict.  After all, no one quite expected the Archduke to be assassinated by a Serb Anarchist.  The more likely event in the US would be some excessive clamoring by the Republicans and some event that would essentially force President Obama to save face and overreact to the situation.  It’s already obvious that the current administration is unable to effectively respond to international events and so the most likely scenario that goes bad would have to include the likelihood that they react this way. 

Expect the resurgence of a modern Russian Empire with Putin crowned as the Emperor, Europe to loudly stay neutral and the US to boisterously do nothing of significance.

The Grand Trophy

Some years ago in the mostly rural county we lived in, my mother entered a cake she'd baked into the county fair.  Keep in mind that this was a somewhat rural area where cooking was common and where just about everyone had grown up cooking since youth.  The culture was still very much that of cooking from scratch.  This meant that competition was always tough.  Well she baked the cake (no frosting or toppings) and carried it in.  Once the fair opened my family all eagerly made our way straight to the cake section.  There were many cakes on display, the competition was quite stiff to say the least.  Each one had a half to one inch slice taken out for the judges to taste and examine.  As we walked past the section we finally found my mother's cake. It was down at the end.  Fully one quarter of the cake was gone.  Next to it sat a 1st Place ribbon, a Grand Prize ribbon and a 2 foot trophy for best in show.  We still talk about how the judges probably argued as to whether they should leave at least some of the cake for others to see, but we'd have been just as happy to see an empty plate with the ribbons.

Wow were we proud and happy for my mother, mostly that we were so lucky to have a mother who could cook so well as we knew we always ate well.  However, most proud was my father.  Over the years he made sure that trophy was prominently displayed in our home where all could easily see it as they entered.  He made no qualms in talking about it.  You'd have thought it was his trophy.  Problem is, in his mind it was his trophy.  You see it wasn't so much the trophy itself but what it represented to him.  It represented his "trophy wife."  He viewed my mother as well as any and all accomplishments of hers as his.  

How many marry and then look upon their spouse as property?  Granted this seems to happen more with women than men, but in today's world where more women are out in the workforce it seems to be picking up some with them as well.  Perhaps in ages past the women just did it a little differently in looking at the paycheck of their husband.  Either way whether it be a "trophy wife" a "trophy husband" or even a "trophy child" living through others or taking their accomplishments for yourself is really a lack of character and belittles yourself.  No honest person of character and integrity would ever want to do it.  

Many historians and particularly amongst feminist groups they talk of how in ages past or in other cultures women were often considered not much more than property.  I have spent time in couple of these countries.  It's sad to see.  But this fact does not absolve people today in our "civilized" nation or culture who do virtually the same thing.  

A true spouse always edifies their spouse.  They are proud and happy for their spouse in all their accomplishments and achievements.  They never take those accomplishments or achievements for themselves.  It can at times appear to be fine line between edifying and assuming the achievements of others.  An honest examination of your heart and an honest discussion with your spouse can show the difference, unless you are in denial.